piddledaddle:

if I make you ship something:

1. I am sincerely sorry

2. 1 is a lie

3. it was my plan all along

4. message me stuff about it so we can chat uwu

daftlypunk:

i hit my coworkers shoulder lightly and he was like “you’re going to make me cry like a girl” and i was like “what’s wrong with being a girl?” and he was quiet for a moment then he looked into the distance and whispered “the social standards they’re forced to live by”

roboboners:

jayda95:

all-because-we-fell-in-love:

floozys:

vagina’s are able to stretch wide enough to give birth to a fucking baby and then return to it’s original size but of course being penetrated by that grass blade you call a penis is what’s going to make it “loose”

Uhh. The baby doesnt come out of where the penis goes in…

stay in school y’all

i hate to be the bearer of bad news but the vagina and the vagina are, in fact, the same thing

swolfmoon:

Cressida
fuck yeah.
badrapper:

awwww-cute:

Went kayaking with my girlfriend and we made the cutest friend!

excuse me WHY are his hands up i cant handle this

charleypollard:

i want female villains whose backstory don’t revolve around men breaking their hearts or wanting to be more beautiful than another girl  i want female villains who are evil for the fun of it and i want female villains with tragic backstories that don’t revolve around men i want female villains with backstories and motives just as diverse and complex as male villains i’m so sick of female villains who are only motivated by men and girlhate

(Source: steveeugenecarlsberg)